Even I'm disturbed! And I'm a Sewhora!

Barbie now comes with an optional tramp stamp! To quote Jeremy from Wedding Crashers..."might as well be a bull's eye". Slummin' again, Ken?

http://www.examiner.com/x-2032-Portland-Parenting-Examiner~y2009m3d4-Is-Totally-Stylin-Tattoo-Barbie-right-for-your-kids

Kate Somerville 9!! Kit

While I am a devoted Proactiv user, I have to admit that I don't particularly enjoy using the products. The packaging isn't that special, the products don't smell or feel that great, and the three-step system gets a little boring. But over the years I have figured out that when I go crazy with trying new basic skincare products, my skin goes crazy with breakouts. The best skin advice I ever received was from a facialist at Bliss who said, "As long as you are using high quality product, it doesn't so much matter what you use, as long as you use it consistently." This has been difficult news to swallow, but she definitely has a point. Skin needs to achieve balance, and when you are throwing curveballs all the time, it gets back at you. Isn't payback a b*tch?

But only the good die young. Do as I say, not as a I do. I put the 'hip' in hypocrite when it comes to skincare. I know Proactiv works for me, but I can't help it - I LOVE to try new things! I keep thinking that I am going to find a replacement regimen that is pleasant to use and delivers results. I think I might be on to something with Kate Somerville's collection.

Sephora recently started carrying Kate's line, whereas before I could only find it in some catalogs, boutiques, and on QVC. (To tell you the truth, it was bizarre seeing Kate on QVC...she is a little goofy. I expected her to be all M.D. chic, but she's sort of a fun girlfriend type. Interesting.)

Anyway, this six piece collection seems extensive. I like that it includes a mask and an exfoliator, and the eye cream is nice for those of us who are starting to experience fine lines with our blemishes (lovely).

Here are the set contents:
- 4.0 oz Detox Daily Cleanser
- 5.0 oz Clarifying Treatment Toner
- 1.7 oz Anti Bac Clearing Lotion
- 2.0 oz Clearing Mask
- 0.16 oz ExfoliKate® Intensive Exfoliating Treatment
- 0.16 oz Line Release Under Eye Repair

All in all, a decent line-up. I haven't decided, however, if the products are nice enough to risk ruining my complexion for a while. I mean, the experience of using the products has to be super enjoyable to put my skin on the line. Cool kit, Kate, but not sure quite yet...

P.S. Why is it the 9!! set and not the 911 set? Does anyone else think that this name looks like a typo? If it's not, I would expect the collection to contain 9 products!!

Lindsay Lohan launching self-tanner at Sephora?

In a rather odd interview with E!'s Party Girl at the Mercedes Oscar party, a skeletal Lindsay Lohan (secret service code name: Orange Hands) shared some details about her upcoming projects. She claims one venture is a self-tanner for Sephora (apparently her friend and she "just had an idea, so we did it"). Um, am I the only person who thinks that she is highly unqualified for this position? This is sort of like Lynne Spears coming out with a parenting book.

The BEST tinted moisturizer

For many years I have been devoted to Chanel's Hydramax+ Active Moisture Tinted Lotion SPF 15. The product costs $60 (yikes!), the texture is a little wet for my taste, and the shades are a little too polarized (one is too light, one is too dark, etc), but the scent is delicious. I mean, DELICOUS. I wish I could bathe in this stuff, although that would be really messy. If you have incredibly dry skin (and are either pale or dark), I highly recommend this product. Seriously, your significant other won't be able to stop kissing you on the cheek because of the magnificent scent. It's available here: http://uma.chanel.com/skincare/hydration-collection.php



But behold - a new tinted moisturizer has entered my life and has shown me what I've been missing all this time. Korres' Watermelon Lightweight Tinted Moisturizer SPF 30 is incredible. The scent is still pleasant (but Chanel wins this round), but the texture of this product is unparalleled. It sinks right into skin and feels light as air while still offering just enough coverage. I don't feel afraid of touching my face throughout the day, because this product feels more like sophisticated skincare than makeup. Plus, the shade I picked up matches my skin tone perfectly (maybe I got lucky here, but I hope you strike gold like I did).

The trick to this product is to let your skincare sink in very well first. I have oily skin (except around my eye area), so in the mornings I use a cleanser, toner, treatment, and eye cream, but no moisturizer since this Korres product provides all the hydration I need. If you like to wear regular moisturizer, however, let it sink in before applying the tinted version. The Korres product creates a beautiful finish when applied to 'dry' skin (not talking superlatively dry here - just skin without wetness), but when mixed with other liquids, it's a little like oil and water. But don't get nervous about this - if applied correctly, the results are astounding.

And HELLO, it's $28 and SPF 30! Need I go on? You get slightly less than the Chanel product, but it still lasts forever. I hope you enjoy! Buy it here: www.sephora.com/browse/product.jhtml?id=P212710&categoryId=B70

Clinique Happy Customizable Bottle

The smell of Clinique Happy reminds me of middle school, but I am loving the new make-your-own-bottle feature associated with this product. What a smart way for the brand to breathe new life into a 90s item.

When my masterpiece arrived in the mail, however, I was pretty disappointed in the quality of the graphic. I think that the manufacturers used an HP printer from the same year as Happy's launch to create my photo label. :( So don't have high hopes when you place your order, but it is a great gift idea for someone who already wears the scent.

Totally random, but Whitney Port killed it with this outfit. Lauren Conrad, eat your heart out.

Lukewarm feelings, Ralph Lauren

Read this right-on-the-money description of Ralph Lauren's new fragrance called Love, Ralph Lauren. I smelled this one at Saks Fifth Avenue in New York, and maybe my expectations were too high, but it is soooo mediocre. I'm sorry, but with a name like Love, it has to be amazing! The note story is interesting enough (Tibetan goji berry, Bulgarian rose, warm golden amber, creamy sandalwood), but the result smells pretty much like Notorious (but less interesting). See what I mean here:

Chandler Burr's Scent Notes' Review of Love, Ralph Lauren
http://themoment.blogs.nytimes.com/2009/02/19/scent-notes-love-ralph-lauren/

Keep My Motor Running - Review of the Artemis Heel Smoother

Maaaaan, I had such high hopes for this foot product. You already know my opinion of the Ped Egg, so I was hoping that this tool would be a step up (pun intended). But sadly, it is not.

The major issue with the Artemis product is that the MOTOR STOPS RUNNING when you apply the slightest amount of pressure to your heels...and I like to get an arm workout while giving myself an at-home pedicure! And my heels need an aggressive rub.

This product can't even withstand a little elbow grease. Saaaad.